The Journey of Redemption

So, I think about this road I've traveled sometimes and I wonder why I would invite others on it. This space in which I write is about the process of me changing hands: taking my life out of my own hands and giving away to someone who knows how to use it better. The word I choose for this process of changing hands, this road I travel on, is Redemption. And you know what...it hurts!

I truly wonder sometimes if someone had told me what I would go through because of my life choice, all this pain and sorrow and scubula (go look that up...it's Greek), I really wonder if I would have chosen this road. You hear stories of weighing out the cost of our journey before we make a decision, but I wonder how much we can really understand...like when someone tells me that they are 'ready to get married.' I really love to hear that because it's worth one of those really good laughs, you know, so deep from your bowels that the laugh itself either hurts your abs or makes you need to vomit or poop.

I don't know that it's really possible to understand marriage well enough to know that you're ready to get married. I don't think our senses can truly comprehend what marriage is truly about until we are knee-deep in it. You, Mrs. Singleville, have the tiniest glimmer of and idea of what it is like to give yourself so completely to someone that you share your existence with them? Bah Hahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!! (that's that laugh I was talking about!)

I think it's the same with Redemption. We think we're ready and understand the journey, but then we look back one day from a WayPoint high in the hills. We see where the road led through loss and love and fire and rain. We know that we never ever want to be any place else than on this road, but we cannot see how we ever would have come this way on our own...

This is where I am tonight...I hope to see you on the road sometime...I wouldn't trade it!

Redemption
by Jars of Clay

We made it to a strange town
Going down the wrong road
Like any story retold
Couldn't find a common ending
We're way gone, be gone, looking for our own way

We needed a distraction
You said you were redemption

We knew it as a wrong turn
We couldn't know the things we'd gain
When we reach the other border
We look out way down past the road we came from

We're looking for redemption
It was hidden in the landscape
Of loss and love and fire and rain
Never would have come this way
Looking for redemption

We were looking out past the road we came from

Looking at redemption
Hidden in the landscape
Of loss and love and fire and rain
Never would have come this way
Looking for redemption
In the eyes of sorrow, eyes of rage
What a sordid histories they played
The drama of redemption
Redemption